When Your Body Knows: Realigning Purpose and Meaning

Do you ever get that feeling of misalignment—like you’re swimming upstream, or your body is trying to tell you something? In the fall of 2023, I felt this acutely. It wasn’t just typical aches and pains; it was a deep, physical sensation that something wasn’t right. It disrupted my sleep, led to rapid weight loss, created uncertainty, made me short with the people I love, and diminished my resilience. Why the physical manifestations? I was head down, tackling the next challenge or solving creative problems, perhaps unaware of whether I was truly aligned with purpose.

As it turns out, my body knew well before I did. It was reacting to a fundamental shift in my work environment and my growing inability to find the purpose and meaning I craved. This was troubling for two main reasons:

Turns out, my body was right. It was reacting to a fundamental shift in my work environment and my inability to find the purpose and meaning I craved. This was troubling for two main reasons:

1. My work defined me. After 34 years, my identity was intertwined with the business. It was where I sought validation and applause.
2. My work was no longer aligned with my purpose. It didn’t fit the framework I had built for my life.

My Purpose-Driven Life Guide

For years, I’ve relied on a guide I’ve developed, my own self-styled Purpose-Driven Life Guide to navigate my decisions and actions. Inspired by Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, I wrote my first mission statement in 2017. Over time, that one sentence grew into a set of operating principles and beliefs. One part of that guide reads:

“I am at my best when my life and work have meaning, I deliver on my commitments, people respect me, I can influence outcomes, my work feeds me, aligns with my moral compass, I am a key player on a high-performing team, and I am continually growing. Additionally, I seek appropriate challenges and find situations that keep me highly engaged and energized. This is my purpose.”

So, what was going on? My body was signaling that I was misaligned with my purpose. My work didn’t violate my values, and I still cared for the people I worked with, but the work itself lacked meaning for me. Two of my core pillars had eroded, and I was teetering. This situation was not sustainable.

The Meaning Maintenance Model

To make sense of this discomfort, I found clarity in the Meaning Maintenance Model (MMM), a psychological theory developed by Steven Heine, Travis Proulx, and Kathleen Vohs in 2006. The MMM suggests that people have a fundamental need for meaning, and when that sense of meaning is disrupted, we are driven to restore it.

The model identifies four pillars of meaning:

1. Value – Knowing what is right, wrong, or important in life.
2. Purpose – Having goals or a direction to work toward.
3. Belonging – Building meaningful social connections and relationships.
4. Efficacy – Believing that your actions have an impact.

When one of these pillars is threatened, we instinctively try to reinforce the others to regain balance. This might mean finding comfort in routines, seeking support from relationships, reaffirming beliefs, or engaging in meaningful work.

Listening to My Body and Realigning

In times of crisis, it’s hard to think clearly. The daily grind, urgent tasks, and swirling emotions make it difficult to identify the root of the issue. But deep down, I knew—I felt—that I was out of alignment with my purpose. My body wouldn’t let me ignore it.

Ultimately, this realization, combined with the principles in my guide, led me to make a change. And that change was a gift. It gave me the freedom I craved and brought my life back into alignment with my values, beliefs, and purpose.

A Path to Flourishing

This experience sparked a deeper exploration of purpose: What makes purpose special? How does it exist in our lives? What factors help us flourish? What intrinsic elements create a good life, and how can we prioritize these paths?

While the authors of the MMM didn’t prescribe a specific order for the pillars, I believe the following sequence matters:

1. Value: Know yourself first. What do you stand for at a fundamental level?
2. Purpose: Identify what drives you, centers you, and makes your work meaningful.
3. Belonging: Cultivate deep relationships. Research shows that even one meaningful connection can make us happier and live longer.
4. Efficacy: Engage in meaningful work, using your unique gifts to make an impact.

Are You Out of Alignment?

Do you feel misaligned with any of these four pillars? My advice: start at the top. Work your way through them over time in pursuit of being your best self. A life – personal and professional – steeped in purpose is a recipe for a good life.